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Mr. Cher Scholar Testifies for Vets

Reasons Why I Will Never Run a Cher Fan Club


Last week I joked about running an underground Cher fan club. But I've come to realize I am not a person who would ever do this.



  1. I am antisocial and the last person on earth who should be running a social club. I recently told my therapist that if I could get away with it, I would be one of those creepy persons who never left their house and had food delivered once a week. I’d only come out for my periodic garage sales which I would have in order that I wouldn’t end up in a Collier’s Mansion. I may be antisocial, but I hate clutter.
  2. It would leave me no time for Getting a Life. Time consuming.
  3. It's a muddy and thankless job and attracts fan-freaks like a mad-magnet.
  4. It would step on somebody's sensitive toes. Cher fans and their competing turf wars depress me.
  5. If you want a snarky Cher newsletter, hit File on your browser menu and click "Print"



I'm definitely with you on #1. I'm ready to go live in a remote beach house somewhere, never to see the big city or even a computer screen again.


oh I am so with you Rob - NYC is a constant nightmare now - especially with morons and their PDAs weaving all over the sidewalks. Gimme a deserted beach.

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